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Bad Decisions

It was a Tuesday. And poor Bennie had been called into the living room where Marnie and one of the twins (Brett, but Bennie sure didn't remember his name) were watching TV. "What do you want, woman?" asked Bennie, mostly good-naturedly. He had been about to go clean the grill outside. It was a nice day, and he was planning to grill some steaks for dinner later. That was pretty much all that was on his mind.

"I have some.. interesting ... news, Bennie, honey." Marnie started, a little hesitantly.

The tone of her voice got Bennie's attention more than the words. "WHAT?" he bit out, wishing she would just get to the point. She never called him honey.

"I took a test this morning. I'm pregnant." Marnie smiled at him, completely missing the shock turning to anger on Bennie's face. "We're going to have another baby!"

"We're ... WHAT??!??" yelled Bennie, nearly choking on his BLT. "This isn't possible! You said the new birth control was practically foolproof!" In a rage, he flung his sandwich across the room, and the plate shattered against the wall. Brett, wisely, decided watching TV wasn't what he wanted to do and he crawled off the couch quietly and headed downstairs.

"Accidents happen!" Marnie exclaimed defensively, suddenly worried she may have gone a bit too far.

She stood up to go clean up the mess of the shattered plate, refusing to say anything else.

After she cleaned it up, Bennie confronted her again, grabbing her arm. "And you're sure about this??" he growled. "You're not just pulling my leg, or jumping to conclusions with a false positive, are you?"

"Bennie, I wouldn't do that to you. I waited until I was sure to tell you. I've been feeling really run down lately, and I wasn't sure why, so I got a couple tests and I tried both. Both came back positive. It's a good thing we have this new, big, house, right?" She said, trying to appear cheerful and like the thunderous look on Bennie's face wasn't actually there.

Saying nothing, Bennie turned on his heel and stomped away from Marnie. He really just had nothing else to say at the moment. Not anything that could be printed, at least.

Later, having not seen Bennie again, Marnie pulled out her winter gear, and told Jaz to do the same. Newcrest, after all, was colder than Oasis Springs. Excitedly, Jaz got ready for the long bus ride across towns again.

After arriving, Marnie sat down on the couch, thinking quietly to herself. Dr. Gemma came out of her office almost right away, and Jaz followed her inside, shutting the door behind them.

Gemma and Jaz discussed the week, asking if anything had happened.. and then Gemma apologized for not calling her this week.

Jaz looked at her, startled, having mostly forgotten that Gemma was supposed to talk to the school and get back to her. "So, what happened?" Jaz asked, curiously.

"I've been arguing with the school system all week. They keep saying they can't allow you to use a private bathroom anytime you need to go without the parent's knowledge and permission. So, we're basically back at square one until you want to tell your parents that you're non-binary." Gemma explained. "That doesn't mean you have to come out right away. Just that you're going to have to keep finding times when other kids aren't around to use the bathroom for a while more."

Out in the hallway, Marnie's thoughts were far, far away. A secret smile stole across her face and she felt her still-flat (ish) abdomen. Accident, indeed. Benji's life success had impressed her so much that she had figured maybe she was a better parent than she had thought. Myles was a great kid, and all three of her children had managed to get A's this quarter. She missed the baby stage. The twins were too independent now to really scratch the itch for cuddling a baby. Plus, Bella just had a new baby, and maybe the two could grow up together. It would be so much fun to set up play dates with Bella and the two babies as they grew up....

.. Back in the office, clueless to Marnie's thoughts, Jaz and Gemma were talking conspiratorially, trying to figure out what to do.

"You know what?" Jaz finally said. "I just have to get my parents to sign the paperwork, right? I mean, coming out can't be all that bad. It's not like it's going to change who I am, it only changes the pronouns I use and how I see myself. But I've already been seeing myself like that, so I guess it's time other people did, too." She smiled at Gemma, who was looking at her with a concerned impression.

"It's not always quite that easy, sweetie." Gemma started, then glanced at her watch. This was her last appointment of the day, and she knew Marnie and Jaz had to catch the last bus before it got much later. She couldn't extend the session any farther. "But if that's what you want to do...?"

"Definitely." Jaz said, grinning. "I'll be fine, Gemma, don't worry. I'll get everyone in the living room and tell them tonight. Then I'll just get them to sign the papers. If anything goes wrong, I have your card."

"That's true enough." Gemma said, smiling, and stood up to walk with Jaz and Marnie down the stairs.

As they left the Center's front door, Gemma impulsively gathered Jaz into a hug, whispering so Marnie couldn't hear, "I will be thinking of you. I wish you the very best, sweetie."

Jaz hugged Gemma back, surprised. She .. no.. THEY... (they thought to themselves) couldn't remember the last hug they'd gotten from an adult. Riding on a real high, Jaz couldn't imagine anything going wrong, and couldn't wait to get home and tell their whole family. The twins, of course, wouldn't understand yet, but families are about supporting each other, right?

After the bus ride home, Marnie wearily sat down on the couch, too tired to put her winter gear away yet, and waited for the storm that was likely to occur when Bennie got home from his Tuesday night gig.

Bennie came home in a great mood. He was one gig closer to a promotion. He could just SENSE that his "big break" was coming soon. (He had forgotten, probably purposely, that conversation this morning. Startled, he noticed the entire family except for the twins seemed to be waiting for him.

"What's going on?" he said, suspicious, and then remembered what Marnie had told him this morning. Surely she wasn't planning on telling the kids already?!

"Jaz has something she wants to tell us, apparently." Marnie said, smiling wearily and looking over at Jaz.

"Okay. This might sound a little weird, but I really want to tell you guys what I've found out through Gemma's help. I'm NOT a girl." Jaz started, grinning from ear to ear.

Marnie and Bennie were looking at Jaz with bewildered looks, while Myles and Phoenix had turned to their parents for support with confused looks on their faces.

"Now, that's not what it sounds like. I'm not a boy either. I'm actually non-binary. I'm somewhere in between. That's why I have so many problems going to the bathroom with people around. It's not just a privacy issue."

"So, from now on, if you could just use the pronouns "they" and "them" for me, that would be great. Oh - and I have a couple papers for you guys to sign so I can use the teachers lounge bathroom. Not a big deal, really." Jaz concluded THEIR "explanation", and grinned happily at THEIR family. In their mind, this was an easy to solve situation. There shouldn't be any problem getting them to sign papers that would help Jaz every day in school, right?

The LAST thing she expected... was that their entire family would break out in loud laughter, clearly at their expense. Expressions of disbelief and hilarity crossed every single one of their faces, and the longer it continued, the more Jaz felt embarrassed.

"It's not funny. I'm being serious." Jaz said, looking down. The laughter didn't stop, and in fact they were all laughing even harder. Sighing, and turning red all the way to their hairline, Jaz told them, "Fine. Forget I said anything. It's not a big deal. And it's certainly not this funny."

Jaz sat there, feeling their heart sink into their chest in a big, tight, lump. Crazily, they felt like crying. Well, if their family reacted this way, perhaps this wasn't a good time to tell their friends, either. They felt hot tears rising, and started to get up from the couch, but Marnie stopped them.

"Well, while we're all here, I might as well tell you. Bennie and I are expecting again. You're going to have another brother or sister in about 8 months!" Marnie said, grinning from ear to ear, trying to ignore the daggers Bennie was glaring into her back. She looked at the startled looks on her now-quiet family's faces... and decided discretion was definitely the better part of valor. Marnie stood up and left the room to put her winter gear away, already having forgot what Jaz had brought up just minutes ago.

The boys also stood up to leave the room, and Bennie, exhausted from a long night at work, turned on the TV to wind down for bed. All were silent, reeling over the information of a new Malone entering the world soon. Jaz's announcement was all but forgotten. For now.

Trying to look at the bright side of things, Jaz walked into the upstairs hall bathroom and tried to give themselves a pep talk. "I'm strong. I'm a fighter. And I am not a GIRL or a BOY. I don't HAVE to be. I can be what I want to be. Whether they like it or not." Jaz muttered to the mirror.

Feeling better, Jaz decided it was WAY too late to call Gemma with the bad news, and that they were DEFINITELY not telling any of their friends about this whole thing tomorrow. Being laughed at by their family was enough for one week. It stung, it really did. Jaz truly didn't understand what could possibly have been funny about what they said, and pushed the feelings down and away. Tomorrow was a new day, after all.

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